this child

They say you just gotta laugh.  Even when you want to cry, find something to just laugh about.

So I am learning to laugh.  And trying not cry. 

Sometimes it is easier to laugh after the fact and after your child is peacefully asleep in his bed and after the mess of the day is cleaned up.

My child is wild.  I know he is two.  I know he is a boy.  But even so, he rivals any other two year old boy I have met.

Or my family have met. Or his teachers have met.

The kid is nonstop. And he is big and strong.

I am thankful we have an active, full of life, excited child. Really, I am. I don't mean to sound like I am complaining. I am not. I love being a mom of a boy.

But, oh dear me he is exhausting.

The truth is, I would pull my hair out if I stayed home with him all day, every day.  I don't love spending 7:15-5:30 M-F away from him, but I also don't think I would be able to stay home all day either.  He wasn't this wild when I stayed home full-time.  When I started work when he was 18 months he was still, relatively, manageable. 

I can see now why we had plans of him going to a mother's morning out program a few times a week if I were able to stay home - for a moment of sanity.

My parents are convinced I need to write down all the crazies this child puts us through. I already do that some here, but I want to do better.

That way, in a couple of years when he is calmer (hopefully????) and we are dealing with another 2 year old, I will know that I have been through it before and survived. And hopefully came out stronger. Or, if nothing else, I will remember where all of my gray hair came from.

Few Jones-ism that I don't want to forget.  And maybe some I do want to forget:

1) He wakes up ready to go.  There is no snuggling. No good morning loving. The minute you pick him up out of his crib, he says "Me walk." and he takes off. Running.  There is usually a 5-10 minute battle to change his diaper.  2 seconds is far too long for him to sit still.

2) He chases Sophie around the house and picks her up.  He throws her, kicks her, and loves on her way too hard.  She pretty much hates her life.

3) He still sits in a high chair to eat.  We have tried regular chair and booster seat.  He will not sit still.  Not even for a minute. We tried every day for a week straight.  I don't think we ate at all.  So for now, even at 34 lbs, he sits in a high chair.  When he finishes his meal, he dumps out all remaining food and milk either on his head or on Sophie, who is always underneath hoping for crumbs. We discipline for this every time with no luck. He throws his food, utensils, everything. Restaurants are nightmares.

4) He has broken two lamps in the past week.

5) Just last night he took off his diaper while I was getting his bath ready, ran to the living room, stood on the couch and tee-teed everywhere. He was very proud of himself.

6) He tells me to STAY anytime he wants to do something himself (which is always. for everything). He is very strong and can physically push me into another room.  Last night he locked me out of the room.

7) He still hits. I am at my wits end on this.  We have tried everything. Ignoring, spanking, time out. Nothing seems to work.  We try to be consistent, but we haven't found what clicks with him. Just the other day he hit me (on the face. hard) so I held both of his arms and told him we never, ever hit anyone.  He head-butted me. As hard as he could.  I am pretty sure I blacked out.

8) He doesn't really play with toys, he just holds them while he runs around. He will play ball, but only if he is moving at all times.  Maybe a future soccer star?

9) We had a church picnic the other night that was moved indoors due to rain.  In a matter of two minutes, my child managed to break away from me and Trey, push little old ladies out of line and grab handfuls of chips of the table. Then he ran to the stage, pushed over the microphone, jumped off the said stage and grabbed a poor kids hat.  All in 2 seconds flat.

10) He is the sweetest thing at bedtime.  Baths are exhausting.  Changing diapers and clothes are exhausting.  And sometimes getting him to his room is exhausting.   But sweet rocking time.  The minute you turn off his lamp and start rocking him, he lays his head down and lets me just rock and sing to him.  It is, very literally, the only time of the day that he is still.  Sometimes I rock him for way too long. Then he curls up in his bed and sleeps all night.  For that, I am very, very grateful.


I love this boy more than anything in this world.  There are times that I want to bottle him up at this age. He is so funny. So loving. But oh so busy, wild, strong - both in will and physically. 

I know he is not the first wild child. And I know he is not the first to go through terrible twos.

Someone give me words of inspiration.  I have heard three is worse.  Dear me, tell me this ain't so.